I read that once. Of course now that I want to quote more about it, I can't remember who said it or how exactly it is said. Here's the gist:
There is no such thing as a hard decision. Decisions only seem hard when we don't like the answer.I am in that situation. I realize that my decision was made on Thursday, but I kept an open mind. It wasn't until Sunday on my LONG drive home that I was able to look at it for what it was and come to terms with it.
I wanted SO BADLY to move to Illinois. I wanted to be part of Melissa's and her family's life. I wanted the boys to really get to know their Aunt Megan. I had visions of what life would be like. Sure, I found places that I could live in. But no where that I WANTED to live in. Nothing felt like IT, a place I could call HOME.
I feel guilty about it all. (well I did... yesterday) I dragged Dad (although he did volunteer) all around the corn country - 5 straight days of 8 hours in the car! I feel like I mislead the Wheeler family. But I remind myself the point of the trip was EXACTLY for this situation. Better to have checked it out ahead of time, rather than move blindly. I do not mean to offend those that live in Illinois, but they have no landscape. It's all corn and soybean.
As we drove home, and crossed into Ohio, I realized that I actually like Ohio. Weird as that seems. It also seemed disproportionate to move so far from MOST of my family to be near a small PART of my family. One time in my life I had that "I belong here" feeling. I didn't believe it existed, people told me about it. It's supposed to be the same feeling that tells you "he's the one" -- you just KNOW. I got that feeling walking through UD campus when I was a senior in high school. I'm wondering why it was so automatic for me to just "move home" after college. Why not stay there? (oh yeah, the whole job thing) Anyway, I did really like Cuyahoga Falls. I liked the State Park, I liked the trees, the nature, the uniqueness. (and the conveniences not too far away).
Both times in the past week when we've driven past Dayton I had a pang of "missing". I miss that area, I miss Meijiers!! But there is Yellow Springs, Young's Dairy, the Minor League Hockey Team, the UD Games --Football and Basketball, it's near to Cinci, and not too far from Columbus, there's the airbase museum and tons of Wright Brother stuff. Plus I KNOW there's a Kiwanis club there that I would fit into. I also realized a lot of my UD friends still live IN THE AREA.
I also calculated...it's only about 4 hours to Oakland (where Melissa will be) that's STILL by far the closest we've been! I could easily do a weekend trip for Birthdays and other special occassions. We could still go camping together in the summers. Realistically the places that I would be "happy enough" in near her, were still over an hour away, so I wouldn't go there very often anyway.
Plus this puts me only between 4 and 5 hours from my parents (Both Dad and I have made two ways trips in one day when necessary) but it's really not unreasonable. It also puts me about an hour from Ashley, so hopefully we'll be able to get together more often . (she's currently 2 1/2-3 hours away)
Teaching- Teachers are paid much better in the Dayton area -- at least compared to my school. Plus I don't have to worry about switching my license, taking additional tests, worrying about switching my retirement, etc.
When I got home last night, I did some quick research on jobs -- found a few still open and applied for them. But I also looked at some local apartments. They seemed price comparable to those I was looking at in Illinois but they are on beautiful properties with unique floorplans, and most allow even BIG dogs!
I dare you to look at the pictures of these apartments:
Arbors at Yankee Vineyard
Spinnaker Cove
Harbour Club
This feels better. This feels right.
So what about that Rainbow I saw? Well, I misinterpreted it. Actually, I fibbed a bit when I told you about it. I was concerned when I saw it, that I had to turn around to see it. IT was over Dayton. We were pulling away from it... toward Indiana. At the moment I saw it, I knew. (But didn't want to know because I wanted to move to Ill) My rainbow was centered in OHIO.
Oh yeah, and there are 4 CrossFits within 30 minutes of the Dayton area!
I really never thought I would say this... but Ohio really is pretty. Those midwest farm states don't know what they're missin!
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